


rhythm & blues

by tobihoe (writeforthesoul)



Series: snapshots [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, First Kiss, Fluff, Getting Together, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Lots of kissing, M/M, Not Beta Read, Slow Burn, THERE IS A LOT OF KISSING OKAY, Underage Drinking, like a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-08
Updated: 2016-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-25 10:55:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6192253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writeforthesoul/pseuds/tobihoe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yamaguchi Tadashi is like the stars and Tsukishima Kei didn't realize just how gay he was until he met him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. am/pm

**Author's Note:**

> TIMELINE
> 
> 1) rhythm & blues  
> 2) hot like coffee
> 
> [also ya boi is looking for a beta reader so if you're interested hmu]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi keeps making a fool of himself in front of that customer. That customer that keeps showing up at the worst possible times.

Yamaguchi Tadashi's mother always told him he was too kind. It took him 13 years and Kageyama Tobio to realize that his mom really meant he was a pushover.

It wasn't the bullies who took his lunch that made him realize it.

It wasn't the girlfriends who used him to get back at their exes that made him realize it.

It wasn't even his good friends Hinata and Yachi that brought it to his attention. Not even once.

It was Kageyama freakin' Tobio.

The stubborn, black haired guy Yamaguchi worked with a few shifts a week. Were they amicable? Yeah. Were they friends? No, Yamaguchi didn't think he could consider them friends. The boy always had a scowl on his face and didn't really open himself up for conversation. (And Yamaguchi was vaguely frightened of him, but he kept that to himself.)

Kageyama freakin' Tobio. 

The only soul on earth, apparently, who could make Yamaguchi rethink his entire life perspective in 2 sentences.

\---

Their assistant manager, Sawamura, dropped the question near the end of the midday shift. Right before he was leaving, in fact.

"Suga's sick. Could one of you take the night shift tonight?"

Kageyama explained that he had early class tomorrow.

Yamaguchi looked into the hopeful, apologetic glimmer in Sawamura's eyes and sighed.

"I can take it."

Sawamura smiled broadly. "Thank you so much Yamaguchi. Really appreciate this one. You've closed up before, right?"

Yamaguchi nodded his consent and watched their manager wave goodbye and leave, the bell at the door to the Sleepless Crow tinkling. A snort brought his attention back to his co-worker.

"What?" he asked, surprised.

"Why are you such a pushover? You could have easily just said you were busy," Kageyama replied.

"What?" Yamaguchi asked again, nose crinkling. Before the other could respond, the bell tinkled again and Yamaguchi went to serve the girls who just came in, mulling Kageyama's words in the back of his mind.

\---

Approximately seven hours later he figured it out. 

Kageyama had gone home. The customers had gone home. Yamaguchi had wiped the tables about three times and organized the bar four times, trying to figure out what else to do before he could close up and head home. He was dead on his feet. Who keeps a coffee shop open until 12:30 AM? He wouldn't, that's for sure. No one in their right mind would want to work a double shift and close for the night, only to open the next freakin' morning.

He suddenly felt like there was a bell ringing in his head.

It was him. Yamaguchi was the one not in his right mind. He had taken a double that day, and was opening the next morning. In approximately six and half hours, as a matter of fact. Probably only five of those hours would be spent sleeping.

Ah. That was what Kageyama meant.

Even though he should have told Sawamura that no, sorry, he couldn't work tonight, it simply wasn't healthy to work for eleven hours, take a nap, and then get up and work another four. And then go to class. Sorry Sawamura, I just can't do it today. Easy peasy. But no. Why take care of yourself when you could just jump to please people instead?

"Oh my god," he whined, rubbing his eyes and raising his head off the counter, only to leap to attention, shock shivering its way down his spine.

Somebody was looming over him.

The guy looked about as shocked as Yamaguchi felt.

"I'm so sorry!" Yamaguchi immediately blabbed to the customer. "This isn't like me, I just had a really long day, and I don't normally close, and -"

"Calm down," the customer said, easily regaining his composure and coolly raising his eyebrow at Yamaguchi's near-hysterics.

"Sorry," Yamaguchi murmured again, for good measure. "What can I get you?" he added, just a little louder.

"Can I get a coffee please? With room?" Yamaguchi nodded his assent, took the change the guy handed to him, and quickly poured him a cup. He watched the customer put illegal amounts of sugar and cream in it, wished him a goodnight, and watched as the guy nodded to him and left the Sleepless Crow.

The bell tinkled on the customer's retreat, and Yamaguchi came to his second shocking realization of the night. There was indeed one person in the world who got coffee past midnight, and only one person stupid enough to volunteer to keep the shop open that long.

Yamaguchi made quick work of the cleanup and left the shop, bell tinkling warmly as if saying goodnight. Belatedly, he realized the bells in his head weren't from his brilliant observances this evening, but from sensory misdirection due to exhaustion.

He thanked the door and the bells anyway, and bid them goodnight.

\---

Suga had made him promise not to be too hard on himself, but Daichi couldn't help the overwhelming wave of guilt that came over him when he saw the bags under Yamaguchi's eyes.

"I'm so sorry," he apologized. "I wasn't thinking it through when I asked you to cover Suga's shift last night. I was just worried about Suga, because of course, he wouldn't tell me he's sick until absolutely necessary. And you're the only one who doesn't have morning class on Friday. And I didn't want to call in extra help," Daichi paused, glad he didn't use his last resort. "But I really am sorry," he finished, quite genuinely.

"Don't worry about it," Yamaguchi said, mollified by his manager's sincere apology. 

"Do you need anything I can grab for you?" Sawamura asked him.

Yamaguchi waved away Sawamura's concerns. He felt good, surprisingly good, considering how little sleep he got. Ah, the miracle of caffeine.

After another round of apologies, Daichi left the shop and Yamaguchi was alone until Shimizu came in for her shift.

Friday mornings were usually busy. This one was no exception. Yamaguchi felt overwhelmingly relieved when Kinoshita came in to start the lunch shift, and even more relieved when he was finally able to clock out.

He checked himself out in the washroom mirror before heading to his afternoon class. His freckles seemed to stand out more against his pale skin, and the bags under his eyes were couture. He quickly pulled out the elastic in his hair and let his hair fall around his face. Great. The dark contrast made him look even more pale, and his hair was a wreck. Frustrated, he yanked his hood up and turned away and stomped through the door. 

And ran straight into someone.

"S-sorry!" Yamaguchi stuttered, looking up and meeting the calculating gold eyes of last night's customer. 

The customer glanced over him (Yamaguchi tried not to feel like he was being x-rayed) and then smirked.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't the sleeping barista," he said, smoothly.

Yamaguchi's jaw dropped. The customer recognized him. The _very attractive_ customer recognized him. The very attractive customer recognized _him_. When he looked like this.

"I have to go!" he squeaked, and ran through the shop and out the door, bag bumping between his shoulder blades.

He tried not to feel like the bells were laughing at him this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tysm guys for keeping up with this series holy smokes
> 
> i haven't updated in a while bc i had issues starting this one? but once i got the flow it was fine. so updates should come more or less regularly now!
> 
> if you see any glaring spelling/grammar errors i would love if you could let me know so i can fix it asap <3
> 
> kudos and comments are always appreciated!  
> xoxo


	2. am/fm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi is hopeless.
> 
> (Luckily for him, so is the very attractive customer.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's 3AM i haven't edited i'm gonna post anyway  
> NO GODS NO KINGS NO MASTERS

"Yamaguchi, would you be able to take Suga's shift again this Thursday? He's got bronchitis, apparently." At least Sawamura gave him a few days notice this time. "I'll switch your shift so you aren't working a double. Noya said he'd be able to do the lunch shift on Thursday."

Yamaguchi tried to ignore the vindictive little bit inside of him that was perversely pleased that Kageyama would have to work with Nishinoya. He was still a little grumpy that Kageyama dropped the truth bomb on him, so what the hell. Get rekt Kageyama.

At least his classes and work managed to distract him from how he embarrassed himself in front of the hot customer. And it distracted him from thoughts about how he might see him again this Thursday. Well, mostly.

Not really at all, actually.

Yamaguchi was driving himself to near distraction thinking about the aforementioned customer. He couldn't get his smirk out of his head, or the way his cool, golden eyes flashed like they were analyzing every inch of you and looking for all your weaknesses. He couldn't get past the way his hair looked tousled and soft, like it was begging to have hands run through it. Yamaguchi was hopeless and he didn't even know the guy's name yet.

Thursday night came all too soon and not soon enough. He came in for the evening shift, tried (failed) not to snicker at how frazzled Kageyama looked (working with Noya did that to you), and got down to it.

By 9:30, only the serious students remained, still hopped up from the day's caffeine and stress. By 10:30, Kageyama clocked out and only a few lingering souls that looked like they were desperately trying to finish assignments remained. By 11:30, even those poor saps had filtered away, and Yamaguchi was the only idiot in the shop at this time of night. Again.

By 11:53, the bells above the door tinkled, welcoming a new customer into the shop. Yamaguchi's stomach flipped around a couple times. Butterflies, one could say. Yamaguchi felt more like it was a fish out of water.

"Well well, we meet again," the hot blonde said.

"I'm not sleeping this time," Yamaguchi offered meekly. 

"I hope not," the customer said, raising an eyebrow. "Otherwise you're a killer sleep-talker."

Yamaguchi laughed into his hand. ( _It wasn't a giggle_ , he thought furiously.) The hot customer had a sharp, dry wit about him that Yamaguchi couldn't really resist.

"What can I get you?" he asked, finally managing to control himself.

"Just plain coffee, with room, please."

"Name?"

"I don't really think you need it. Not like there's anyone else around?"

Yamaguchi tried not to blush. He'd hoped the customer wouldn't catch that one. "A-ah, sorry, old habit," he managed to pass off, without too much stuttering.  
The customer raised his eyebrow again. Damn, that made Yamaguchi jealous. He'd always wanted to be able to raise an eyebrow.

“Tsukishima Kei,” the customer said when Yamaguchi handed him the coffee. 

“That's my name,” he added, pouring the same (very liberal) amounts of sugar and cream in his coffee as he had the previous week. 

Tsukishima Kei then went over to the squishy armchairs by the fireplace and flopped down. Yamaguchi watched him pull out a laptop and snap a pair of headphones on. Looks like he was here to stay for a while, unlike last week. 

Looks like he also wasn't super interested in conversation, either, judging by the headphones. 

Yamaguchi shrugged it off, cause like, he couldn't really expect this near stranger to want to hold a conversation with him after only a couple accidental interactions. And it's not like they'd be here too long. It was almost time to close. (Yamaguchi gently shushed the part of him that wanted to leave the shop open longer just so hot blonde Tsukishima Kei could stay longer.) but, regardless, the thought reminded him that he still needed to clean up everything before heading out because he wasn't nearly as diligent about it as he had been last night. So he began. 

\---

“Do you like music?” The question broke Yamaguchi from his reverie. He was just finishing sweeping up. After this, it would be just behind the bar, and the garbage, then he could go. 

Tsukishima’s question took him by surprise. “I suppose so, yes,” he answered, leaning on his broom. “Why?” He asked, genuinely curious as to why Tsukishima wanted to know. 

Tsukishima smirked at him. “You've been humming along with the music for awhile now,” he said. 

Yamaguchi felt himself flush, grateful that his skin didn't show too much of the redness. “Sorry,” he said quickly. “I don't realize when I'm doing it. I don't even realize we have music on in here, it's such a constant to me.”

“Don't be sorry,” Tsukishima said, looking back at his laptop. “You have a nice voice.”

Yamaguchi was glad Tsukishima had stopped looking at him because he was 90% sure his cheeks were on fire. Maybe even his body. Maybe even the whole building. Who knew at this point?

“Thanks!” He squeaked, which Tsukishima acknowledged with a cool nod and a simple, “You should listen to the radio more often." Yamaguchi tried sweeping again for another couple minutes but it felt quiet. Too quiet. He couldn't hum even if he wanted to because Tsukishima hadn't pulled his headphones back over his ears after their exchange. 

The only noise was the ticking of the clock in the background and some guy warbling on the radio. 

“ _We tried the world, good God, it wasn't for us_ ,” he crooned to Yamaguchi.

“What brings you here so late at night?” he blurts out, mouth betraying his curiosity.

Tsukishima's golden eyes seem to hold him in place for a second, and then a curious smile graced his face. “I'm a night owl. And my roommate’s an idiot. I normally hang out here until Sugawara-san closes for the night,” he explains

“Oh,” Yamaguchi says. Trying not to feel disappointed, like he thought Tsukishima had stayed just for him ( _shut up_ , he told the long suffering part of his brain that provided such scenarios). And then his traitorous mouth added, “So why did you leave so soon last week?”

The smirk reappeared on Tsukishima’s face. “I hoped you'd be sensible and close up early if no one was here. Obviously you needed the sleep.”

Yamaguchi just kind of... blinked at the boy. Tsukishima hummed under his breath and then returned his gaze to his laptop. 

Yamaguchi paused for another moment, let the information settle into his brain, then made a quick decision. He went back to the counter and grabbed the last piece of cake in the display. He hurried to the back room and placed it in a box, along with a note that he scribbled out, and wrapped it up in a gold ribbon. 

The tinkling of the bell made Yamaguchi realize Tsukishima was leaving. Grabbing the box, he dashed back out to see him walking past the front window. Yamaguchi ran out the door, bells tinkling merrily. 

“Hey, Tsukishima! Hey, TSUKKI!” Yamaguchi hollered.

Tsukishima turned, bemused (that the barista thought he couldn't hear him because of his headphones) and only a slight bit perturbed (at the fact the barista had called him _Tsukki_ ). “What’s up?” he asked, as Yamaguchi thrust the box at him. 

“Last slice of cake,” Yamaguchi said, slightly breathlessly. “I wanted to apologize for last week and I figured you liked sweet stuff.”

Yamaguchi felt a little hopeful at the small smile that graced Tsukishima’s face. “Anyway, good night,” he murmured, heading back to the Sleepless Crow to finish closing up for the night. 

He almost missed the quiet goodnight he got in return. Almost. 

\---

Tsukishima Kei opened the box right there under the dim streetlight. A piece of strawberry shortcake sat in the middle, looking artfully delicious.

Oh god. He was so fucked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh my god so i'm like 90% sure i'm flipping between the tenses in this fic yolo (but don't worry i'm gonna make it all consistent when i'm less sleep deprived?)
> 
> also pls don't count the number of times i used their name.
> 
> hmu with dem comments and kudos i love yall xoxo


	3. cake/lists

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima Kei has lost his goddamn mind and everyone except Yamaguchi knows it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god bless sugawara koushi

Tsukishima Kei was so fucked.

Strawberry shortcake. Humming. That stupid note. Freckles. It was all running through his brain on repeat - just like that one annoying extremely annoying pop song he got stuck in his head sometimes.

Strawberry shortcake. Humming. Note. Freckles.

Even his the idiot of the century, otherwise known as his roommate, otherwise known as Kageyama Tobio noticed something was wrong.

"What wrong?" the moron asked (predictably), after Kei slammed his face into his pillow for probably the one hundred and eighty fifth time. Kei spared him half a glance. Kageyama's face looked even more constipated than usual.

"Nothing," Kei muttered, sending him a halfhearted glare. _Strawberry shortcake, humming, note, freckles,_ his mind protested. Kei scoffed at it. As if he was going to talk to Kageyama Tobio about his feelings.

SCRATCH THAT. There were no feelings to talk about. None. ( _Strawberry shortcake,_ his mind whispered.)

Cue the one hundred eighty sixth head slam.

As much as he didn't want to admit it, Kei's insufferable roommate was correct. Something was wrong, something was very wrong, and Kei needed to talk about it before he actually lost his god damn mind.

Lists were good. Lists helped you keep your brain in order and stopped you from losing said god damn mind. ( _Strawberry shortcake, humming, note, freckles_ , Kei's mind whispered. _DIFFERENT LIST_ , he whispered back.)

Perhaps a list of potential candidates to talk to.

1) Yachi, that kind barista that was in the coffee shop sometimes.  
2) Suga-san, that other kind barista that was in the coffee shop sometimes.  
3) Akaashi, that sensible second year that he was somehow friends with.

Kei considered the (un)fortunately short list. He almost immediately crossed off Akaashi. Because if he told Akaashi, it was almost positive Stupid Spikey Hair #1 would find out, even if Akaashi did his best to keep his secret. Stupid Spikey Hair #1 was creepy like that. And if Stupid Spikey Hair #1 found out, it was one hundred percent positive that Stupid Spikey Hair #2 would find out. Kei didn't think he would live through that disaster.

That left Yachi and Suga-san. After careful consideration, Kei decided on Suga-san, although he was pretty sure Sugawara was actually somewhat evil. No one was that angelic looking without having a mischievous streak a mile wide. The guy was number one on Kei's list of Things He Currently Does Not Understand, and he was sure there was going to be some sort of backlash to talking to him. But he was also pretty sure Yachi was terrified of him, and would faint or call the police if he tried to have a conversation with her.

Kei couldn't wait until Thursday to talk to Sugawara, that was for sure. Because _he_ might be there, just like he had been for the past two weeks. And as much as that thrilled Kei, he wanted to figure his shit out before seeing _him_ again.

He sent a brief text to Suga-san, slammed his face into his pillow for the one hundred and eighty seventh time that night, and fell asleep.

(And if he dreamed about a strawberry that sang tantalizingly to him, it was his own damn business.)

\---

Kei met up with Sugawara at The Sleepless Crow. It was a risky choice, he knew, but he also didn't know many other places that had quite as good coffee. Or quite as attractive baristas. (One of them in particular wasn't working today. Kei wasn't sure if his shoulders tensed in relief or disappointment.)

"Tsukishima! Over here!" Kei looked over to see Suga-san waving at him from a seat by the window. He pointed at the two cups of coffee on the table and beamed at Kei. Really, it was unfair how nice he looked. If he wasn't already aware he was gay, Suga definitely would have made him notice.

"Thanks," he said, slumping down into the seat opposite Sugawara. He took a sip of coffee and hummed appreciatively. Sugawara had noticed that he liked his coffee sweet, and had prepared it accordingly. "You know, if you weren't so into Sawamura, I'd consider asking you out myself," he deadpanned.

Sugawara choked on the tea he'd just taken a sip of. "I'm not- we're not- not-" he spluttered, face bright red.

"Sure thing, Suga-san. I've seen the way you two look at each other," he said, allowing a smirk to grace his generally cool disposition. He felt a spark of pleasure at being able to rattle his (generally) very sensible senior. Still, he wasn't an entirely heartless bastard, and passed Suga some napkins to wipe his face. Once he regained his composure, Sugawara leveled a sly smile at Kei, one that spoke insurmountable evil.

"So when did you realize you were in love with Yamaguchi Tadashi?"

It was Kei's turn to gape. His mouth moved like a fish out of water, and he felt the full body flush come. The one that turned him as red as a strawberry. ( _Strawberry shortcake, hummi- NOPE, nope, not going there,_ Kei thought desperately.)

Suga looked evilly delighted.

"I knew it!" he crowed, as Kei ascended. ( _Fuck this shit I'm out, mhmmm,_ his mind sang.)

"I'm not IN LOVE," he hollered, once the full weight of Sugawara's words processed. People stared at him, vaguely worried. "Wha... How did you know?" he whispered.

There was a kind twinkle in Suga's eyes that definitely did not match the devilish smile on his lips. "You're a man of routine, Tsukishima," he said, sighing. "And as far as I'm aware, there's only been one change in your routine that could have prompted this little get-together. Every Thursday, after your show, you come in to The Sleepless Crow for very sweet coffee and some company that is not your - and I quote - 'insufferable moron of a roommate'. But alas, these past two Thursdays, something has been different from this comfortable routine. I have not been working the Thursday night shift. Who has? A certain adorable, freckled Yamaguchi Tadashi. Whom you have a crush on," Suga finished, quite proud of himself.

Kei blinked a few times. Sugawara really was... something, he decided.

"You know," Suga continued. "I wasn't totally sure if I came to the correct decision myself, until you so gloriously confirmed it like that," he said.

If only he used his powers for good, instead of evil, Kei thought. Instead, "He gave me cake..." came out of his mouth.

Sugawara looked all too pleased. "Anything else?" he prompted.

"...His number."

If it was socially acceptable, Kei was pretty sure Sugawara would have jumped up and started squealing. Instead, his shit-eating grin grew so big Kei was pretty sure his face was going to break.

"Oh yes, this is good," Suga breathed, rubbing his hands together. Kei couldn't believe his eyes. Suga literally fucking rubbed his hands together like the evil genius he was. And like the idiot Kei was, he just sat there as the devil plotted his demise. Finally, "What are you going to do?"

Kei shrugged. As if he had any idea.

"Well, call him at least!" Suga yelped. 

_Fuck this shit I'm out, no thanks!_

"Could you be any louder?" Kei asked grimly. It was bad enough that he was talking about feelings, but he was also doing it in a public place. Where anyone could overhear. He glanced around, double checking for eavesdroppers. The shop bell tinkled. In walked -

( _STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE, HUMMING, NOTE, FRECKLES_ )

Sugawara follwed his line of sight. And proceeded to give him the most shit-eatingiest grin that Kei had ever seen grace this earth.

"Sorry Tsukishima! I just remembered, I have a class to get to! I'll be heading out now," he chirped, ignoring the panic in Kei's eyes. "Yamaguchi!" he called, and had the audacity to wave him over.

"Hi Suga-san," the boy replied, breathlessly, once he made his way over. "Hi Tsukk-Tsukishima," he said, smiling a little at Kei. Kei was praying to all the angels above that he didn't do something stupid like smile back at him.

"Hi," he replied, smiling back at him.

Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) I'M SORRY IT'S SO SHORT I BLAME MIDTERMS KICKING MY ASS
> 
> 2) soz if suga is ooc for some reason i find him THE hardest character to write but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> 3) 90% sure [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5FjWe31S_0g) is tsukki's ringtone
> 
> 4) pls tell me abt inconsistencies/errors cause it's 3 AM and no editing has been done agian
> 
> 5)kudos+comments keep the ball rollin, 
> 
> 6)AND I HONESTLY LOVE Y'ALL XOOXO


	4. sugar/spice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima Kei is not cool and Yamaguchi Tadashi is not okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHAT EVEN IS EDITING
> 
> EDIT: (LMAO the irony) i had to change a tiny thing to make the next chap seamless but it's so small u probably wont even notice it

Tsukishima Kei felt about as uncomfortable as Yamaguchi Tadashi looked. Sugawara had danced away gleefully right after the introductions, leaving Kei internally screaming.

"Mind if I sit here?" Yamaguchi asked, gesturing to the seat Suga had just vacated.

"Go ahead," Kei answered, thanking all the deities above his voice remained steady.

Yamaguchi sat, eyes flicking around the store nervously. They landed on Kei's coffee on the table between them.

"Coffee!" he yelped, jumping back up. Kei watched him wring his hands together. "I came here for coffee. And um. Sat down. Without coffee," he stammered, and then winced.

Kei just blinked at him, because if he opened his mouth, he was sure that all his internal screaming would come out.

"Um, so I'm going to go get some. Coffee."

Kei nodded.

Yamaguchi gave him a shaky grin. "Save my seat?" he said, phrasing it more like a statement than a question.

Kill Bill sirens started going off in Kei's head, and it was all Kei could do to murmur his assent, and hope he didn't sound too stupid. As soon as Yamaguchi was out of audible and (mostly) visual range, Kei slumped forward and let his head hit the table.

"Pull your shit together Kei," he mumbled to himself. He took a deep, shaky breath, and pulled it together.

\---

If there weren't any other customers around, Yamaguchi would have lunged right over the counter.

"He's so attractive," he hissed, wanting to grab Yachi and shake her just so she'd understand. He restrained himself, though. Innocent bystanders would probably call the police on him for harassing the poor girl.

Yachi smiled sympathetically at him.

"Tadashi, no matter how cute he is, you're being ridiculous. Just talk to him," she chided. "You had no problem before, right?"

Yamaguchi widened his eyes, trying to convey his seriousness. " _Hitoka_. That was _before_ I left him my number, and he didn't call me _all weekend_."

Yamaguchi watched in disgust as a fond smile crossed Yachi's face. "You're being silly, Tadashi. Just talk to him. I'm serious. He might have had a reason for not calling you." Yamaguchi tried to protest, but Yachi was handing him his drink and shooing him away. "Go," she said firmly. "I have drinks to make and you're scaring away the customers."

"But-" 

" _Go_!"

\---

Kei had a whole list of conversation topics ready for when Yamaguchi returned, with some weird, green, frothy, hipster thing that was most definitely not coffee.

"I'm not scary am I?" Yamaguchi asked him, staring at Kei with wide eyes.

Kei's mind put his list through his brain's theoretical paper shredder as he choked on the coffee he had just taken a sip of.

"OhmygodI'msorryTsukki," Yamaguchi burst out, hesitantly reaching forward toward Kei, and then letting his hands flutter awkwardly back to his sides as he didn't know what to do.

Kei thanked the gods above that he wasn't a blusher, because he was sure his face would have burst into flame at Yamaguchi's casual use of that nickname.

"S'okay," he finally managed to wheeze. "Why do you ask?"

Yamaguchi pouted slightly. "Yachi said I was going to scare away the customers," he said, sinking into his chair.

Kei's eyes widened, and then he clapped a hand over his mouth to stop the laughter that was almost pulled from him. _BE COOL_ , he reminded himself.

Yamaguchi's gaze immediately turned distrustful. "What?" he demanded. "What is it?"

"I mean, you look kind of intimidating, what with all the leather and shit," Kei said, once he regained his cool. He gestured vaguely towards Yamaguchi, who looked down at himself, frowning. 

"I feel like there's a 'but' in there," he said.

"But," Kei continued, smirking slightly. "Anyone who would talk to you for more than 10 seconds would realize you're harmless. In fact, I'm pretty sure I've met a plant that's more aggressive than you are," he mused. 

Yamaguchi stared at him. "A... plant?"

"Yeah," Kei said. "A plant."

"Do I wanna-"

"No. No you do not."

Yamaguchi covered his mouth and let out a giggle, eyes meeting Kei's. Kei couldn't stop the rush of warmth in his chest, and the small smile that graced his face.

They didn't realize they were staring at each other until a small cough sounded from above them.

Kei's eyes snapped up and away from Yamaguchi, and landed on the small blonde barista standing beside their table. ( _Yachi_ , his mind supplied.)

"Um, sorry for interrupting, but I brought you guys some cake," she said, a little pink.

"Thanks Hitoka," Yamaguchi said, smiling gratefully at her. 

Kei was a little startled at the name, but smiled at the girl as well. She put down the plate, and squeaked something about needing to get back to Shimizu.

"I asked her to bring it over, earlier," Yamaguchi explained, smiling.

Kei didn't respond. He was too busy short circuiting.

Yachi had brought over a piece of goddamn strawberry shortcake.

\---

Yamaguchi stared in horror. He knew exactly why Tsukki wasn't responding. He was staring at the stupid piece of cake Yachi had brought over. Yamaguchi should have specified the kind of cake for her to bring over. And now the boy across from him seemed to be having some sort of crisis. His mouth was literally hanging open, and his golden eyes, normally flashing with mirth, were flat.

"I'm so sorry Tsukki!" he almost shouted, and then winced again. He shouldn't be so familiar with a guy he just met who clearly wasn't into him. "I shouldn't have asked Yachi to bring over the cake and I shouldn't have given you that cake in the first place, along with my number, 'cause obviously you aren't interested and-"

"Strawberry shortcake is my favourite," he whispered. Yamaguchi froze, unsure if he heard him correctly.

Tsukishima was smiling, as he slowly raised his head. "Strawberry shortcake is my favourite. And you didn't overstep when you gave me your number. I'm just a bit of a wimp when it comes to calling really cute guys."

And then they were both laughing, tears squeezing out of the corners of their eyes. Other customers looked over at them strangely, wondering why these two boys were laughing hysterically at a piece of cake.

Yamaguchi's stomach hurt when he finally wheezed to a stop. He grinned up at Tsukishima, who lifted his glasses and brushed away a stray tear, and then smiled back at Yamaguchi.

Their silence wasn't uncomfortable, for once.

\---

"So how do you know Yachi?" Yamaguchi asked Kei.

Kei frowned, considering. "I don't really know her that well, to be honest. Just from the times I've been here during her shift, and I think we have a business management course together," he explained. "How do you know her? You seem to know each other really well," he asked Yamaguchi.

Yamaguchi shrugged. "We dated last summer," he said.

Kei's stomach dropped. Was he- was he misreading the whole thing? The internal screaming started again.

Yamaguchi looked up, becoming aware of the tense atmosphere. He read the situation instantly, and smothered a giggle with his hand.

Kei wasn't sure why, but that relaxed him a little.

"Don't worry," Yamaguchi smiled. "I'm bisexual. Yachi and I dated for just over a month, and then realized it wasn't really working. If it makes sense, we were just too friendly? It felt weird to think of her romantically, y'know? We tried it because we were super close, but then ended it because it just wasn't right. That and she realized she had a super huge crush on our other friend Hinata's old babysitter. Weird, right?"

Kei just blinked at him, his mind not really registering a whole lot besides 'I'm bisexual'.

"Thank god," he finally muttered. "You had me scared for a second that my gay ass misread the whole situation and started hitting on a straight guy."

Yamaguchi started blushing a little, but then frowned.

"Tsukki, honestly, what kind of straight guy gives another guy a piece of cake and his number in a coffee shop? That's like the most cliché thing to ever happen."

Kei just shrugged. "Weirder things have happened to me."

Yamaguchi stared at him.

Kei shrugged again. "I have weird friends," he offered in explanation. And then he winced, unsure if he wanted to admit to the world that he was friends with those idiots.

Yamaguchi still looked a little lost.

"You'll understand if you meet them," Kei said, and then decided it was time to switch the subject. Yamaguchi would probably run away screaming if he met his friends too soon and Kei would never see him again. Kei wasn't ready for that.

"Do you like music?" he asked, and then winced. Again. He was going to develop a permanent twitch at this rate.

Yamaguchi chuckled behind his hand. "I take it you _really_ like music," he said, gesturing to the headphones around Kei's neck. "Those, and the fact that you asked me the exact same thing the other night."

Kei fought off the full body cringe. It felt like there were monkeys banging around in his skull, making him stupid. He wondered, distantly, if this is how Kageyama felt all the time.

"Yeah," he said out loud to Yamaguchi. "I really like music."

"Majoring in it?"

"Economics."

Yamaguchi frowned at that. "If you like it so much, why don't you pursue it?"

Kei shrugged noncommittally. "It's more of a hobby," he replied, hoping the words didn't sound rehearsed. Yamaguchi's brow furrowed even further, and Kei could tell he didn't really buy it.

"Well I hope you can recommend me some good music then," Yamaguchi finally said.

Kei smiled. A real smile.

"You came to the right guy."

\---

A small tap on the glass had Kei looking up. Yaku gave him a thumbs up, asking if he was good to go, as was their routine. Kei gave a nod in return, and with a wave, Yaku departed, locking the door behind him.

Kei smiled.

Now that no one was around, he turned the volume up in the booth, and snapped the headphones back over his ears. The song was winding to a close, just past 10:31. Perfect.

"And that was Work, by Rihanna, featuring Drake. Cool song, nice beat, but what is she actually saying? If any of you find out, please let me know. This is Firefly, and welcome to your all-request Thursday night.

"To everyone out there, you can tweet me with your requests @FireflyRadio - anything goes. You can also hit me up with any questions you want answered, or topics you'd like me to talk about."

Kei's phone chirped, signalling a tweet.

"Wow, you guys sure are eager tonight. @TokaXO wants to hear Pillowtalk by Zayn. A little mainstream, TokaXO, but I don't blame you, it's catchy as hell. Here it is," he said, pulling up the song on the computer. "Pillowtalk, by Zayn." He let the music filter in over his words, and smiled.

Even though he knew he was being broadcast over the airwaves, Kei felt secluded and invincible in the studio.

Kei played a few more requests, throwing in some comments here and there. Another notification popped up on his phone, showing a question instead of a request.

"That was Knee Socks by the Arctic Monkeys for @ryuuandyuu and guys, I gotta say, I don't even want to know why you have a joint twitter account. 

"Weird bromances aside, I have my first question finally. I was starting to think you guys are bored of me. @TheFrenchiestFry asks 'why the anonymity #mysterious also does /anyone/ know who you are' and I must say Frenchiest Fry, I'm not sure my anonymity is more mysterious than your twitter handle. But that aside, I started this radio show anonymously at first 'cause I didn't want this to overlap with my daily life. It's just habit now. Also, there are a few individuals who know who I am, but I have blackmail material on every single one of them so they wouldn't dream of telling anyone.

"And with that, let's play Lonely Hearts Club by Marina and the Diamonds for @KingCourt. That's a little sad, King. I hope you get some soon."

Kei played the song snickering, pretending like he didn't know that was his roommate's twitter.

The chirp from his phone alerted him to two new tweets.

"Just to keep you guys updated, @KingCourt tweeted me saying he's having sex right now, and I'm not saying I don't believe you, King, but I don't believe you. 

"@TheFrenchiestFry tells me he 'just really likes french fries'. I don't want to comment on that.

"@ThighGuy94 has requested My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion. Here you go, Thigh Guy," Kei said, unable to keep the smirk out of his tone as he played the song.

After a few more songs, Kei checked the time. It was almost 11:30, which meant he had to wind down the show. 

"Alright guys, hate to say it but my time's almost up. I probably only have time for one or two more songs, so make it interesting." A chime lit up his phone almost immediately.

"Hmm, very interesting, @SugaandSpice would like to know what I think about love. I see we're finishing the evening on a sappy note, SugaandSpice. To be frank with you, I'm not a huge fan of love."

Kei paused, and then took a deep breath.

"But I think, every once in a while, someone comes along that's worth a shot."

His phone chimed.

"@SugaandSpice says 'sounds like you have a crush Firefly, would you play us a song that makes you think of them?'" Kei rolled his eyes, ignoring the complete lack of subtlety. 

"Sure. What the hell."

\---

"Hey Tsukki!" Yamaguchi said as the bell tinkled, leaning the broom he was sweeping with up against the counter.

"'Sup Yamaguchi," Kei said, coming in the shop tiredly. "Wait, Yamaguchi?" 

Yamaguchi rubbed the back of his head nervously. "Heh, yeah, Suga asked me to come in tonight 'cause he said he had a bunch of work to catch up on from all the school he missed."

_Suga was the devil. It was decided._

"And Daichi said he might hire someone else to do the Friday morning shift, so I'm not so tired out all the time."

_Oh god, Suga got Daichi in on it._

"Akaashi-san, I think his name was."

_Oh god, Suga got them ALL in on it._

"Are you okay Tsukki?"

Kei stared at Yamaguchi. He looked concerned, like Kei was about to faint or something.

In his defence, Kei was trying to ask if he could get a coffee. Instead, what came out of his mouth was, "Can I kiss you?" It sounded far too desperate and breathy, but Kei couldn't find it in himself to care.

Yamaguchi opened and closed his mouth a couple times before jerking his head in a sharp nod. His cheeks were flooded with colour. Kei didn't think he'd ever seen something so attractive in his life.

His only thought as he closed the distance between them was _I wonder if he tastes like strawberries_. And then he was pressing their lips together, and it was too soft, and too gentle, until Yamaguchi tilted his jaw up and pressed _back_. His arms snaked up around Kei and his fingers tangled in his hair, and Kei was sliding his hands down Yamaguchi's sides, pressing him in closer, needing more, because the way Yamaguchi's lips were spreading fire on his own was too good and too much and not enough all at the same time.

Kei pulled back with a shuddering breath, and leaned his forehead against Yamaguchi's. He opened up his eyes and watched as Yamaguchi's eyelids fluttered open.

"Wow," Kei whispered, and Yamaguchi giggled. His nose scrunched up when he did that, so Kei kissed it. And then he kissed him again, just because he could. "Do something with me tomorrow," he murmured against Yamaguchi's lips.

"Sure," Yamaguchi said breathlessly. "What are we doing?"

"Revenge," Kei said, a decidedly evil smirk on his face as he pulled back from Yamaguchi. "We are doing revenge."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) GET FUCKIN REKT KAGS  
> 2) their twitter handles are dorky af soz  
> 3) midterms are literally kicking my ass with shoes handed to them by anxiety so im very sorry for sporadic updates  
> 4) im going to be mergin the chapters once im done the next (final) chapter of this lil ficlet  
> 5) it's 2:40 am and i havent edited or anything so yeah if there are any glaringly obvious problems pls pls pls tell me i dont ahve a beta reader to catch this stuff  
> 6) i can FEEL the quality of this chap deteriorate as i got more tired while writing, but my momma didnt raise no quitter so im posting anwyay and i'll proably fix it eventually lmao  
> 7) GET FUCKIN REKT KAGS
> 
> xoxoox


	5. moon/stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima Kei makes a Plan and Yamaguchi Tadashi is thirsty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> incredibly sorry for the late update i was ~worldbuilding~
> 
> u can listen to the party playlist [HERE](http://8tracks.com/writeforthesoul/make-like-a-bulbous-root-vegetable) also, i tagged it as underage drinking because even though it's not explicitly stated that this takes place in japan, the characters are japanese and the drinking age in japan is 20
> 
> EDIT: to clarify, in my mind, this does take place in japan, but i dont like to explicitly state places and prefer to leave it to the reader's imagination. also, having never been to japan, i dont think i could write it correctly and do it justice

Tsukishima Kei had a Plan. And a Plan like this needed people more people than just him to execute it. He stared at the contacts in his phone, and figured those two were his best option for Phase Two. He smirked at the near immediate and enthusiastic responses. He hesitated, and then sent off the text for Phase One. He hoped it would work out.

Now for Phase Three. He smirked as he opened his laptop. This was going to pull together quite nicely. 

\---

Yamaguchi Tadashi groaned as he heard the door, but he couldn't bring himself to open his eyes. He felt the bed shift as Hinata threw himself upwards and spun around to face his roommate.

"Hi Kenma!" he chirped.

"...Do I want to know?" Kenma asked quietly, indicating the still figure of Yamaguchi, hanging upside down off Hinata's bed.

"He's having a crisis. A boy crisis," Hinata said, waggling his eyebrows at Kenma. Kenma just hummed noncommittally and went over to his side of the room as Yamaguchi groaned again.

He felt the bed shift again, and opened his eyes to see Hinata hanging upside down beside him. His orange hair flopped away from his head, and made him look like he had just stuck his finger in an electrical socket. The mental image cheered Yamaguchi up slightly, before he felt guilty that the idea of his best friend getting electrocuted was the only thing making him feel better right now.

"He's diabolical," he whined to Hinata.

"Which means..."

"Wicked. Evil. Unholy," Yamaguchi listed.

"So your boyfriend is the devil," Hinata concluded, grinning.

"He's not my boyfriend," Yamaguchi said unhappily. They kissed, sure, but they hadn't specified what they were. "And he can't be the devil, he's too pretty for that. Too pretty. And a really good kisser, with very soft hair..." Yamaguchi looked over at Hinata's thoughtful and bemused face, which was slowly turning red from hanging upside down. "Anyway, devil or not, he said he wanted to hang out today. We're doing," he paused, realizing that 'revenge' wasn't usually a common date. "We're doing a thing," he decided on.

"Oh?" Hinata said, grinning. He sat up suddenly. "My butt just buzzed."

"Yeah, we're doing a thing. And he said he'd text me the details, but he hasn't yet. It's," Yamaguchi patted around for his phone, and after he couldn't find it, gave up. "It's some time in the evening, and he hasn't texted me yet." Yamaguchi sighed again, ever suffering.

"It's 6:48 in the evening, and this guy wouldn't happen to be 'Tsukki <3' in your phone would he?"

Yamaguchi shot up like he was electrocuted.

Kenma sighed in the background as the two younger boys had a brief squabble over the phone ("Give me my phone Hinata!" "You're the one who left it on my bed!" "I didn't mean for you to _sit_ on it!" "That's not my fault!" "Gimme the phone Shou!"). He looked up when there was a thump and Yamaguchi was on the floor looking delightedly at his phone. Hinata was triumphant on the bed, but pouting nonetheless as he did not have Yamaguchi's phone in his possession. Shaking his head, he turned back to his game.

_**From: Tsukki <3**  
[18:48] You ready to start The Plan?_

_**To: Tsukki <3**  
[18:50] i'm a little worried 'The Plan' is capitalized. _

_**From: Tsukki <3 **  
[18:53] ...That's fair. How do you feel about parties? _

_**To: Tsukki <3**  
[18:54] theyre fun! r we going to one???_

_**From: Tsukki <3**  
[18:54] Probably. If everything works out. Which it should._

_**From: Tsukki <3**  
[18:54] Is the Hinata you know Hinata Shouyou?_

_**To: Tsukki <3**  
[18:55] yeah!!im with him rn, y?_

_**From: Tsukki <3**  
[18:55] Do you know his roommate, Kozume Kenma?_

_**To: Tsukki <3**  
[18:55] ....hes here too_

_**From: Tsukki <3**  
[18:55] If you can, I need you to convince him to come to the party tonight. It's at Kuroo's. He'll know where that is._

_**To: Tsukki <3**  
[18:57] i can do that probably_

_**From: Tsukki <3**  
[18:57] What's your address?_

_**To: Tsukki <3**  
[18:57] ????_

_**From: Tsukki <3**  
[18:57] I want to take you for dinner before the party tonight._

Yamaguchi fought the blush he could feel creeping up.

"Good news I guess?" Hinata asked, pouting. Yamaguchi felt a little bad, realizing he had been ignoring his friend for quite a while.

"Hey, do you want to go to a party tonight?" he asked instead of answering.

Hinata brightened immediately, and grinned.

\---

After getting Hinata and (miraculously) Kenma to agree to go to the party, he headed straight to his room. Luckily he was in the same building block as his friends so he only had to run up three flights of stairs to get to it. It took him a couple tries to get the right key, but he finally managed to get into his room, which was a mess. After picking out an outfit, he grabbed the massive pile of clean unfolded laundry off his clean unfolded laundry chair (also known as a desk chair) and shoved it unceremoniously into his closet. He then yanked off his sweatpants and hoodie, and threw on a more appropriate date outfit. Once dressed, he hurried down the hall into the washroom, where he brushed his teeth (even though he hadn't eaten dinner yet) and washed his face. Contemplating said face in the mirror, Yamaguchi thanked his lucky stars he didn't look too tired for once. His face was a little flushed from running around, which he was grateful for, because it helped his freckles stand out less. Yamaguchi grimaced for a half second at his hair, which he had tied half back in a bun earlier. Despite it being a little messy, it didn't look bad so he left it. His hair was notoriously unmanageable and if he tried to fix it, or flatten out that one piece that always wanted to stick up, he'd just end up making it worse. He exchanged a couple of his normal studs for different piercings, and allowed himself to grin. He still wasn't totally used to how they looked, but he liked it.

Yamaguchi then realized he had spent far too long checking himself out, and that Tsukishima was probably here already. With a yelp, he burst out of the washroom (scaring a girl who was just entering the common room) and scrambled back to his room. He quickly shoved his hoodie and sweatpants into the closet, along with another couple things lying around, threw his covers over his bed, and then launched himself at his desk when his phone buzzed.

_**From: Tsukki <3**  
[19:43] Be there soon._

Yamaguchi let out a yelp, feeling like he was missing something. His room was clean, it looked presentable, the pictures on his wall weren't too dorky - 

_A plant._ Yamaguchi didn't have a houseplant. That was the number one item to add aesthetic to a room, and he didn't have one.

Yamaguchi started panicking, wondering if his neighbours would maybe have one he could borrow when a knock interrupted his racing thoughts. Yamaguchi's heart leapt into his throat. _Be cool_ he thought to himself as he pulled open the door.

"Hey," he said casually, like he hadn't spent the entire wait for Tsukishima to pick him up driving himself insane. And then caught his breath, because _Tsukki looks hot as hell_. He was wearing a red flannel shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbows revealing his sexy forearms - forearms were not supposed to be a sexy body part, and yet apparently they were on Tsukishima. The jeans he was wearing fit nicely, but hung just loose enough that Yamaguchi wasn't treated to the rest of his physique, but judging from those forearms, it had to be good.

It was at that moment Yamaguchi realized he was staring and Tsukishima had said something.

"Sorry Tsukki!" he chirped breathlessly, pretending he totally wasn't affected by his ogling session. "What did you say?"

"You look good," Tsukishima said, swallowing. Yamaguchi watched his throat bob, entranced, before his words registered and he blushed.

"Heh, thank you Tsukki," he murmured, rubbing the back of his head. Their eyes met and Yamaguchi felt electricity skitter down his spine before he blushed again and his eyes flashed away.

"Um, so, do you wanna go? I can tell you more about The Plan on the way," Tsukishima offered.

Yamaguchi grinned at him, grabbed his jacket from its hook, and locked his door. "So?"

"How do you feel about kissing?"

\---

"You ready?" Kei asked.

Yamaguchi was staring fiercely at the door, from which they could hear music (not too loud), and multiple voices and screeches (much louder). Kei had warned him about them over dinner, but it wasn't quite like meeting them in person. Yamaguchi nodded.

Kei turned the knob and swung the door open. As expected, there weren't many people there yet. Kei had no doubt as the night went on, more people would show up, but so far, there were just the regular idiots.

One idiot in particular craned his head around at the sound of the door opening. Kei hoped faintly that his neck would snap from how fast he turned.

"Oho?"

No such luck. Hearing the call of his people, the other idiot Kei had been hoping to avoid turned with a shit eating grin. 

"Ohoho! Tsukki! Glad you're here!" The two of them clambered over to the door where Tsukishima was waiting.

"I told you not to call me that," he said frowning, determinedly not looking at Yamaguchi, and grateful (once again) for his skin not showing blushes.

"Who's this?" Spikey #1 asked excitedly.

"This is Yamaguchi," Kei said, as Yamaguchi waved and tried not to show fear.

"More like Yama _gucci_ ," Spikey #2 drawled, shit-eating grin crooked across his face.

Yamaguchi looked puzzled. "That's what... my name is?"

"No, I mean - it's like... never mind. That joke works better written down..." Kei snickered at his obvious floundering. "Kuroo Tetsurou," he finally said, offering his hand. Yamaguchi shook it, no longer looking quite as scared, but still a little cautious.

"Bro, I'm disappointed. Bokuto Koutarou," Bokuto said, puffing up his chest.

"Oh, bro, please, like you weren't trying to make a pun earlier," Kuroo glared at his friend. "They didn't even notice!"

"Who, me?" Bokuto grinned again.

There were a solid couple seconds were Kei and Kuroo stared at him in disgust, and Yamaguchi stared at the three of them in confusion. Then Kuroo launched himself at Bokuto. Yamaguchi jumped back into the safety of the doorway. Kei grabbed his hand and slowly pulled him away to the kitchen.

"We'd best escape while they're distracted," he said casually. Yamaguchi stared at him with wide eyes. Kei couldn't tell what he was thinking. 

"You weren't exaggerating," Yamaguchi finally said. Kei let out a bark of laughter, and then clapped his hand over his mouth. Yamaguchi smiled, and then the two of them were laughing again.

Kei couldn't remember the last person that made him laugh this much.

When they entered the kitchen, Kei let go of Yamaguchi's hand. Yamaguchi looked at him, startled, like he hadn't even realized they were still holding hands. Kei held up two fingers and pointed at the figure that had his back to them, and Yamaguchi nodded in understanding.

"Hey Akaashi," Kei said. "I brought the music."

"Tsukishima, thanks," Akaashi said, continuing to pour his drink. When he turned around, Kei watched Yamaguchi's face out of the corner of his eyes, and was rewarded with a few rapid blinks. "Akaashi Keiji," he said smoothly, holding out his free hand.

"Yamaguchi Tadashi," Yamaguchi said, and Kei was a little surprised at how calm he seemed.

"Nice to meet you," Akaashi said, and smiled a little. "Help yourself, he said, gesturing to the booze on the counter, and the fridge.

Kei nodded his thanks and handed him the drive as Akaashi left. He turned to Yamaguchi.

"Want anything to drink?" Kei asked.

"He's very pretty," Yamaguchi answered. Kei quirked an eyebrow at him. Yamaguchi blushed as he realized what he said, and shook his head as if to clear water from his ears.

"You managed very well though," Kei said. "Most people aren't that calm when they first meet him. Bokuto broke a mug."

"I know more attractive people though," Yamaguchi said, eyes glinting at him.

"Is that so?"

"Yeah, I mean, I work with Suga."

Kei schooled his face into indifference a split second before disappointment flashed across it. He went over to the fridge. "Want a drink?"

"Hey Tsukki?"

"Yeah?"

"I think you're more attractive than both Akaashi and Suga."

Kei spun around to face Yamaguchi, who was staring at him looking both bashful and determined.

"I- Wh-" Kei spluttered. He never spluttered.

Yamaguchi saved him from embarrassment by crossing the space between them, grabbing the front of Kei's shirt, and pressing their lips together, noses bumping painfully. Kei froze, eyes wide, and when he didn't move, Yamaguchi pulled back blushing.

"Sorry Tsukki," he said. "I guess that was kind of-"

Kei reached forward and pulled Yamaguchi toward him, muffling the apology as Kei kissed him back. Yamaguchi's fingers curled back into the front of his shirt. Kei ran his hands up his back and around his shoulders, the soft leather of Yamaguchi's jacket tingling under his palms. 

"S'okay," he said, pulling back, but keeping Yamaguchi in his arms. "Just surprised me, 's all." He leaned back in, and this time Yamaguchi tilted his head at a better angle so they could slot their lips together properly. Kei sucked in a breath as Yamaguchi traced his tongue along Kei's bottom lip. Kei opened his mouth with a breathy gasp and let Yamaguchi stroke along the roof of his mouth, before Kei was sucking on his tongue, and Yamaguchi was whining. Kei pulled him impossibly closer and-

A wolf whistle broke their careful quiet.

Kei and Yamaguchi leapt apart like they had been electrocuted.

"I didn't know my brother had it in him!" Tanaka shouted, grinning crazily.

"We're not brothers," Kei grumbled, feeling distinctly embarrassed and hot. Tanaka ignored him.

"Yuu! Get your ass in- oh," he started yelling and turning, only to stop short when he realized Nishinoya was right behind him, with an evil smile.

"Who's the lucky guy?" he chirped, dancing over to where Yamaguchi was partially hidden by Kei's shadow. Noya pushed Kei ungracefully to the side, and then his jaw dropped.

"Yamaguchi?"

"Noya?"

"Wait, Yamaguchi?"

" _Tanaka_?"

Kei repressed the urge to shout "Donkey!"

"Yamaguchi, what the hell are you doing making out with my lamest brother in Dai-san's kitchen?"

"We're not brothers, Tanaka!" Kei half-shouted.

"Your brother is dating my sister."

"That doesn't make us _brothers_ ," Kei said, pinching his nose exasperatedly.

"YOU WOUND US!"

"Nishinoya, _you aren't his brother either_!"

Tanaka gasped and pulled Noya to his chest. "Yuu has been by my side since we were children."

"Children, Kei! Children! Ryuu is as much my brother as you are," Noya said proudly.

"I need a drink," Kei groaned.

"Wait!" Noya pointed at Yamaguchi. "Kei, why were you making out with _Yamaguchi_?"

Tanaka clapped his hands to his cheeks, and then to Noya's. "Yuu," he gasped. "Yamaguchi is the one Tsukishi-"

"Yamaguchi!" Kei almost yelled, before Tanaka could go further. "How do you know these two idiots?"

"Um," Yamaguchi looked confused at the sudden change of topic. "Noya works at The Crow with me and Tanaka works at the tattoo shop I go to."

Kei suddenly had trouble forming a proper thought.

"Tsukki? Everything okay?"

Kei blinked a couple times. Strawberry shortcake. Humming. Note. Freckles. _Tattoos_. "Yeah! Totally fine!"

The snickering of the Noya and Tanaka snapped him back to reality.

"Don't you two have a job to do?" he snapped, glaring.

Noya gave him a mock salute, Tanaka gave him the finger, and then they both left the kitchen with a couple beers and high fives.

"What's their job?" Yamaguchi asked from behind of him.

Kei grabbed a cider and cracked it open. With his other hand, he gestured for Yamaguchi to follow him.

Kei peered out of the doorway of the kitchen, eyes scanning the considerably bigger crowd until he spotted a familiar head of silver hair.

" _That_ is their part of The Plan," Kei said, smirking.

\---

The couch was super comfy. Yamaguchi was super comfy. His head was lightly buzzing and his lips were tingly. They felt very kissable right now.

"Tsukki," he murmured, "Tsukki we should go find somewhere to make out again." Yamaguchi turned at looked at Tsukishima, who was smirking at him. Their legs were hot where they were pressed against each other, but they weren't close enough. 

Tsukishima leaned closer towards him, but didn't go for his lips like Yamaguchi was hoping. Instead, his lips brushed the shell of his ear.

"Soon," he breathed. "Stick to The Plan."

Right. The Plan. He cast around, looking for the familiar shock of bright orange hair, currently dancing with someone he didn't know.

"Target acquired," he mumbled, and felt Tsukishima laugh beside him. "Phase One is a go."

Yamaguchi untangled himself from the couch, groaning at the loss of heat from his side. He made his way over to the dance floor until he was sidling up next to Hinata. "I need your help!" he half-shouted in Hinata's ear. The music was pulsing through his body, and felt the urge to run back and grab Tsukki and dance with him. But he had to stick to The Plan.

Hinata nodded to him, and allowed himself to be pulled away from the girl he was dancing with. They retreated to the relative quiet of the kitchen.

"What's up?" Hinata asked, pouring himself a glass of water and chugging it down, wiping away the sweat from his forehead.

"So, you know the guy I'm with, Tsukishima?" Yamaguchi started cautiously.

"Blonde, glasses, scowls a lot?" Yamaguchi nodded. "Yeah I know him. Well, now I know him," Hinata answered.

"We kissed again," Yamaguchi started, but held up his hand to Hinata's grin. "But he's not very affectionate in public. And I really..." he cast his eyes to the floor.

"You want him to be."

"Mhmmm."

"You want him to show everyone that you're together and he likes you."

"Yeah."

"Easy."

Yamaguchi looked back up to Hinata, surprised. He expected to need to convince him a little more.

Hinata beamed. "Give me five minutes. Make sure you both have drinks." And with that, he shot out the door.

After Hinata left, Yamaguchi let himself smile. Tsukki was right. The Plan was too easy.

\---

True to his word, Hinata was dragging Yamaguchi and a very reluctant Kenma down to the basement five minutes later.

"Stay," he ordered, and then darted back upstairs.

They could still hear the beat of the music and voices from upstairs, but it was a lot quieter downstairs. Kenma sighed with relief and turned back to his phone.

The yelling started in the distance but slowly got louder. Telltale footsteps thundered down the stairs, and Bokuto appeared with a _very_ disgruntled looking Tsukishima thrown over his shoulder. Akaashi followed them, far more silently, and the group was completed by Kuroo padding down last.

Yamaguchi hid his smile behind his hand when he saw how Kuroo's eyes lit up from seeing Kenma. Oh yes, The Plan was going wonderfully.

Soon, Hinata was back, this time towing Suga, who was giggling, and followed by a very attractive guy, who was in turn followed by a couple giggling girls and (strangely enough) one scowling, muscular guy. Sawamura, Suga's not-quite-boyfriend came next, almost falling down the stairs from Tanaka and Noya pushing him. A very tall, very scary looking guy followed the last of them, encouraged by Noya to join the group.

Yamaguchi raised his eyebrows at Hinata, who beamed and jumped on the coffee table.

"Okay!" he yelled, somehow gaining the attention of the group. They feel quiet, with the exception of a few snickers and a "Can someone turn that thing down?" from Tsukishima beside him.

"Enough from the peanut gallery!" Hinata shouted, glaring at Tsukishima, who didn't even look fazed. "We're all here for one reason, and one reason only! What is that? To get drunk! What's the best way to get drunk? Drinking games!" There were cheers and some hollers from the group, and Yamaguchi distinctly heard someone shout, "I LIKE THIS KID!" He was pretty sure it was Bokuto.

Hinata hopped down off the coffee table, and joined the circle that people were sitting. "So, what first?"

Surprisingly, it was Kuroo who spoke up. "Never have I ever?" he suggested, to a couple groans.

"Bro, that is an amazing idea," Bokuto gasped from beside him.

"Thank you," Kuroo said smugly.

"Can I start?" It was the model-esque guy sandwiched between Suga and the grumpy looking guy that piped up.

"Sure thing, sweet cheeks," Kuroo said, eliciting a groan from many people, Tsukishima included. 

The guy tapped his finger on his chin, almost delicately. "Never have I ever topped," he finally said, smirking. A couple people over, Sawamura choked.

"Way to start us off strong," Kuroo grinned. He raised his glass to lips and took a long swig, as did almost everyone around the circle.

"Suga?" the scary looking guy sounded bewildered as he watched Suga take a drink. "But I thought..." Suga grinned, and Noya burst out into giggles.

Yamaguchi nervously cast his eyes to the side, relieved to see Tsukishima hadn't drank anything, nor had Kenma, Nishinoya, or any of the girls.

"Never have I ever bottomed," the grumpy guy to the model's right said. 

"Iwa-chan!" the model said, gasping and pressing an offended hand to his chest. "I have never felt more attacked than I do right now."

"Shut up and drink, Shittykawa," Iwa-chan responded.

The girls drank, rolling their eyes, along with Noya, who was giggling again, and Akaashi, who's face didn't show any emotion. Much to his surprise, Hinata also drank again, a faint blush on his cheekbones. Suga and Shittykawa both tilted their cups back, high-fiving simultaneously. Yamaguchi was learning far more about his co-worker than he thought he'd ever want to. He was also relieved to notice that yet again, Tsukishima didn't drink anything.

"Your turn Tsukki!" Bokuto chirped.

"Never have I ever not wanted to kill Bokuto," Tsukishima deadpanned back.

Yamaguchi, Hinata, Tanaka, and Noya were the only ones who drank.

Then it was Yamaguchi's turn. He didn't really know what to say. He didn't want to sound lame, but he also didn't want to go too far. 

"Uh, never have I ever gotten high?"

To his surprise, everyone in the circle except Kenma, Hinata, and one of the girls drank. Yamaguchi raised his eyebrows, not only at Tsukishima beside him, but also at Sawamura, his manager, who he was learning was not quite as well-behaved as he presented himself.

"I've had these idiots as my friends for too long now," Tsukishima mumbled to him, misunderstanding Yamaguchi's look as judgement.

Hinata was next, and quickly chirped, "Never have I ever wanted to kiss someone in this room." His jaw dropped as literally everyone drank. "Even you Kenma?"

Kenma just shrugged and ducked his head. "Well fuck me then!" Hinata exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.

"Never have I ever had sex with someone in this room," Kenma said, just barely loud enough to hear over the music thumping from upstairs. Yamaguchi watched with wide eyes as everyone except Kenma and his fellow first years drank. Hinata's jaw dropped. 

"Is this just some giant circle jerk?" he yelled. Bokuto and Kuroo burst out laughing. 

"This guy is priceless," Bokuto gasped, while Kuroo just sounded like a dying hyena. 

After he caught his breath, it was Kuroo's turn. "Never have I ever been in an _actual_ circle jerk," he got out, and was then laughing again.

"Low blow dude," Bokuto said, as he was the only one in the circle who drank. Akaashi smirked.

"Never have I ever blown my best friend," he said, shutting up Kuroo effectively as he drank. Everyone was too busy laughing at Kuroo and Bokuto who were now yelling at each other to notice Suga and Sawamura both drink, along with the two guys beside them. 

When Bokuto realized it was his turn, he stared at Kuroo with a hard look in his eyes. "Never have I ever had a tattoo," he said, grinning. Yamaguchi could see that the two of them were easily falling into a competition of who could make the other person drink more. Yamaguchi took another swig of his drink, along with Kuroo (who was glaring at Bokuto), Noya, and Tanaka. 

The girl next to Bokuto cleared her throat over the bickering of Kuroo and Bokuto, and they quieted down. The girl smirked.

"Never have I ever been gay," she said. Bokuto squinted at her.

"Yukie, when you say gay, you mean...?" he trailed off uncertainly. The girl, Yukie, rolled her eyes.

"Never have I ever not been one hundred percent heterosexual," she said, to the general humming and muttering of the group. Tanaka high-fived her as everyone else drank. Yamaguchi drained the rest of his cup.

"Gonna go upstairs and grab another drink. Want one?" he asked Tsukishima, who nodded and smiled at him in thanks.

Yamaguchi stood up, and made his way to the kitchen.

\---

The Plan was going perfectly. Yamaguchi had done well, coercing Hinata into getting all the correct people in one area. Kei checked his watch. Soon, Phase Two of The Plan would be executed.

By the time Yamaguchi came back down with new drinks for them, which Kei quietly thanked him for, people were losing interest in Never Have I Ever.

"Ready for the next part of The Plan?" Kei murmured to Yamaguchi. He felt Yamaguchi shiver as his lips brushed the shell of his ear. He gave a short, jerky nod. 

"Hinata should pull through any minute now," he breathed back. Kei raised his glance, only to see Hinata staring at the two of them. His eyes skittered away when Kei met his stare, and Kei returned his focus to the rest of the room. Suga and Sawamura were sitting close, but not touching yet. Bokuto and Kuroo were yelling at each other over Akaashi's head, who looked vaguely bored and moderately annoyed. 

"We should play spin the bottle!" Hinata crowed suddenly, causing several heads to turn in his direction. Kei's eyebrows shot up in surprise, before he smoothed it away.

"Oh! Good choice chibi-chan," Oikawa said, gleefully rubbing his hands together. Iwaizumi smacked the back of his head. "Rude Iwa-chan! Does anyone have a bottle?" Bokuto held up his hand, threw his head back, and chugged the rest of his beer. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and placed the bottle in the middle of their circle. With a flick of his wrist, he sent it spinning. Kei watched the bottle circle hypnotically around and around until it slowed and stopped pointing at... him.

Kei was done with the universe. He rolled his eyes as Bokuto crawled over to him grinning. "Do not use tongue," he warned, glaring threateningly at Bokuto.

"Wouldn't dream of it," Bokuto grinned, pulling Kei into a kiss. Kei's eyes shut automatically, but he felt Yamaguchi's leg tense next to his as Bokuto sucked his bottom lip into his mouth. Kei pulled back with a smack, and ignored Bokuto holding up his hand for a high-five. Kei ignored him and spun the bottle, waiting for it to stop. When it did, it was pointing to Tanaka.

"Incest!" Tanaka yelped. He scrambled up, away from the circle. "That's it, I'm done, this is too gay for me!" 

"But we can say no homo," Kei deadpanned, feeling Yamaguchi snicker beside him.

"Nope, I am done here. Yukie, Yui, wanna come? Leave the non-heterosexuals to it?" Yukie rolled her eyes, but stood up. She held out her hand to Michimiya, who allowed herself to be pulled up.

"For the record," she turned to Tanaka. "I, too, am a non-heterosexual, but don't want to deal with all them making out." Michimiya gestured to all the guys still in the circle.

"Yeah yeah, got it. Let's do shots," Tanaka grinned, and then headed upstairs with the two girls following him. Everyone shuffled closer to fill in the gaps in the circle as Kei spun the bottle again. This time, it landed on Kenma. 

Kei crawled across the circle to where Kenma was sitting. He grabbed Kenma's chin and pulled him forward into a deep kiss and only pulled back when he needed air. Kei smirked at Kuroo's shell-shocked look, having had the best view of the two of them from sitting next to Kenma.

Kei returned to his spot, looking up to see the bottle land on Akaashi. Instead of moving around Kuroo, Kenma just leaned over him, and Akaashi met him in the middle. Kuroo stared at the two guys making out practically on his lap with wide eyes, throat working furiously. They only stopped when Nishinoya wolf-whistled and there was some cheering from the group. Phase One complete. Kei checked his watch. Any second now.

The music cranked up right on time and a familiar beat filtered down the stairs. Kei smirked as Oikawa's eyes widened and he clutched at Suga's arm. They were too easy to manipulate.

"Suga," Oikawa breathed. "It's our song." Suga's eyes widened as he recognized the music. For a second, they stared at each other like a couple of surprised owls. Then they were falling over each other, scrambling and giggling to stand up. Suga made it up first, followed quickly by Oikawa as they darted upstairs and out of sight. Sawamura and Iwaizumi gave each other the same look of exasperation before following the other two. Once they were out of sight, the rest of the group burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?" Yamaguchi asked. Kei smirked.

"Sugawara-san and Oikawa have a... thing. When they're drunk enough. For Beyonce," he explained. Yamaguchi didn't look any less confused. Sighing, Kei stood up and pulled Yamaguchi to his feet. "C'mon. It's easiest to just show you."

\---

Yamaguchi wondered if alcohol caused hallucinations. He was pretty sure it didn't, but he was more drunk than he thought he was (Tsukishima's hand at his elbow was the only thing keeping him grounded) and there wasn't another explanation he could think of for the sight in front of him.

"Watch where they look," Tsukishima said, close enough that only Yamaguchi could hear.

Suga was leaned back against the taller model-esque guy, who Yamaguchi hazily recalled Tsukishima calling Oikawa. They were grinding to the beat. Suga had his head thrown back on Oikawa's shoulder, and the were slowly making out. Oikawa trailed his lips down Sugawara's jaw, who slowly lifted his head and made eye contact with a guy across the room. Yamaguchi followed his gaze. It was Sawamura.

"Holy shit," he gasped. "He looks so..."

"Lost?" Tsukishima provided. "Horny?"

"Well yeah," Yamaguchi swallowed. "It's _hot_."

"Mmm," Tsukishima murmured in his ear. They were moving along with the beat now, drawn in by the crowd around them. Tsukishima pressed his lips into Yamaguchi's jaw, and then just below his ear. He sucked on the skin for just a second, and then started talking again. "Everyone can see them. Everyone can see how frustrated Sawamura is. That means Phase Two is complete." He scraped his teeth over the same spot under Yamaguchi's ear. Yamaguchi fought off a shiver. "Ready for Phase Three?" Before Yamaguchi could answer, Tsukishima moved away completely, winked at Yamaguchi, and then disappeared in the crowd.

"So mean, Tsukki," he gasped as his legs wobbled, even though Tsukishima was no longer there to hear him. Someone else caught his arm before he fell, and Yamaguchi was looking into the dark, hooded eyes of Akaashi Keiji. 

_How convenient_.

\---

"Are you seeing this Tsukki?" Bokuto whined, pawing at his arm. Kei sighed away his annoyance.

"Yes, Bokuto, I am seeing this. Don't make it worse." Kei couldn't help but stare at the new pair grinding on the dance floor. Yamaguchi's head was thrown back on Akaashi's shoulders, the two of them looking sinfully attractive dancing together. Something in his stomach flipped. _Ignore it_ Kei told himself. _It's all part of the plan._ Bokuto whined again, and then all of a sudden started smacking Kei's arm super fast.

"Bokuto, WHAT," Kei snapped, barely tearing his eyes away from Yamaguchi. Bokuto's eyes were glowing.

"Dude," he breathed. "Let's make them jealous." Kei smirked as Phase Three snapped into place.

"Y'know Bokuto, I think that's a great idea you've got there, for once."

\---

"D'you see that?" Akaashi murmured to Yamaguchi. He cast his gaze over to where Akaashi was pointing. A familiar blonde head was leaning over a sculpted body that was lying on the island, giggling. The blonde head shot back up with vague disgust, and then pulled the other guy into a sloppy kiss. It was Tsukishima. And Bokuto. Doing body shots.

"Do you suppose," Akaashi said, leaning in so close Yamaguchi could feel his breath on his neck, "that they're trying to make us jealous?"

Yamaguchi hummed noncommittally.

"Do you think, if we tried, we could make them even more jealous?" 

_Wait, what?_

Akaashi spun him around so they were face to face. Yamaguchi stared at him with wide eyes, and then Akaashi was leaning in and carefully moving his lips, sucking and tugging in all the right ways. Yamaguchi groaned low in his throat, hazily realizing that this was not going according to plan.

Then Akaashi's sinful lips were moving down his throat, and Yamaguchi couldn't bring himself to care.

\---

"I never want to taste your bellybutton again," Kei snarled at Bokuto, who didn't respond. They were a couple more shots deep, and Kei wondered if the guy had passed out, but then a hand waved vaguely in front of his face and pointed. Kei followed the point until - _HOLY SHIT_.

Akaashi was kissing Yamaguchi. Like _really_ kissing him. And Yamaguchi was kissing back.

Kei didn't even think before he stormed over and pulled them apart.

"What the hell, Akaashi?" Akaashi didn't respond, just slowly blinked at him, a smile pulling across his face. Kei felt an insistent tug on his hand, which he ignored, because he was too busy trying not to punch the sly smile on Akaashi's face.

"Tsukki!" Kei started, and turned around to face Yamaguchi. "Tsukki, I'm really sorry, this is my fault, I ruined The Plan, and-" Kei cut him off by pressing a chaste kiss to Yamaguchi's over-kissed lips. He reached down and twined their fingers together.

"Not your fault," he said. "It's all his fault." Kei glared at Akaashi, whose smile only grew wider, but it wasn't quite directed at him. Kei froze. The Plan. Frantically, he looked around for Suga, and located him next to the music stand, with a sly grin that matched Akaashi's perfectly.

Kei's heart thumped along with the first guitar notes that started playing. _Oh no_. He turned back to Yamaguchi, who was watching him with a funny smile on his face.

"We've been made," he hissed.

_So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes,  
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight._

"I know," Yamaguchi murmured.

_So deep in this swill with the most familiar of swine  
For reasons wretched and divine._

"We should get out of here," Kei whispered.

_She blows outta nowhere, roman candle of the wild  
Laughing away through my feeble disguise_

"I know," Yamaguchi smiled.

_No other version of me I would rather be tonight.  
And, Lord, she found me just in time_

When they pressed their lips together, despite everyone around them, it was Kei's favourite kiss yet.

_She's gonna save me, call me baby, run her hands through my hair_  
_She'll know me crazy, soothe me daily, better yet she wouldn't care_  
_We'll steal a Lexus, be detectives, ride 'round picking up clues_  
_We'll name our children Jackie and Wilson_  
_Raise 'em on rhythm and blues._  


\---

Later, the found themselves wandering away from the party. Yamaguchi took Tsukishima's hand and led him to his favourite park. They settled down in the grass, not caring about the dew, not caring about anything except the warmth of their arms around each other. They fell asleep together, guarded by the stars and the moon, and dreaming of the sunrise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING THIS FIC im sorry the update took so long i world built this au and another au i have in the works and this wrote this long ass chapter and then it got deleted and i hAD TO REWRITE THE DAMN THING and just ugh BUT IM HAPPY WITH IT SO THAT'S GOOD  
> 1.5) pls pls pls lemme know if there's any terrible grammar or stupid mistakes bc that's the stuff i miss a lot  
> 2) suga and akaashi are vixens no one can convince me otherwise  
> 3) tsukki is a meme fucker no one can convince me otherwise  
> 4) im so sorry for the uber cheesy ending  
> 5) im really not i thrive off cheesy
> 
> but with all honesty though, tysm for reading this fic that was supposed to be a oneshot and turned into this (like i mean i know it's not that long compared to a ton of stuff out there, but it's WAY longer than what it was supposed to be lmao)
> 
> ANYWAY bc ur awesome, u guys can choose what happens next in snapshots.  
> \- daisuga  
> \- asanoya  
> \- bokuaka  
> -more yamatsukki  
> \- 3rd gym shenanigans  
> \- 1st year squad shenanigans  
> V O TE NOW ON YOUR PHONES no but seriously lemme know down in the comments what u'd like to see in this au and i'll do my best!!!  
> xoxooxoxoxooxoxo  
> (also if u ever wanna chat u can hmu [here](http://blueberrytobihoe.tumblr.com/ask))


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